GAP training was a bit interesting this morning. the power went out 20 mins into it and didn't come back on for like 2 hrs. all of masonville was deserted. we sat in darkness in the small staff room in the back (with no windows) with the manager talking to us with a flashlight in her face. hahaa.. there were 7 of us in all crammed into the little room. you could imagine the scene.. kinda funny. so we couldn't watch the training videos due to the power outage so the training was cut down to 2 hrs from 3 hrs. kinda annoying b/c we couldn't do a lot of stuff we should have done. man.. the amount of theft that happens at the GAP is ridiculous. stolen articles of clothing in a year reaching the thousands. eesh..

man today was kinda brutal. sleeping late + not sleeping well + 8am wake up = one tired theresa. i'm not used to waking up that early either. kinda good training ended early so i could come home and nap. my original plan was just to stay at the mall till my 4pm manchu shift. but the nap wasn't that great either.. i think my naps are never that great if i know i have to wake up for something. if i can nap as long as i want.. i can zonk out for like 3 hrs (like i did yesterday) haha. so i was pretty tired at work. so good to be home right now. i just wanna veg on my bed and read.

my dad just called from vancouver. my parents are having a ball over there.. well deserved too. i'll hopefully be going over there for a friend's wedding next summer. so many weddings in the coming year! happy times all around :D

tomorrow marks the first day of the last month of summer. time has flown by yet again. Lord.. help me use this last month wisely......

i was telling ernie last night that i wish i could see ppl like how God sees them. not through my own judgmental eyes.. but through His all loving, compassionate, and forgiving eyes. and today i watched the nooma - dust. and realized it's the same stuff from one of the sermons i got from chia awhile ago.. and the pastor who spoke was using rob bell's stuff. it was about God believing in us. we have faith in Jesus. but how often do we think that Jesus has faith in us? He has faith that we can be like Him. why am i getting down on myself when JESUS Himself has faith in me? so this desire to be like Jesus requires action. but this knowledge that Jesus has faith in me helps a lot. i mean.. it gives me so much more hope.

and this desire to be like Jesus also requires us to remain in Him.

Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
John 15:4-5

He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. John 15:2

i don't want to be cut off because i'm not fruitful.. i want to be pruned. pruning produces fruitfulness. genuine salvation is evidenced by a life of fruitfulness. and at the same time i want God to cut off the things in my life that bear no fruit. this is my prayer today.

i'm talking to enoch right now on msn. sometimes i still wonder how we're friends at all.. our perspectives on things being so different. and sometimes i wish i could talk to him in person because it's like i'm spending half the time trying to repeat what he's saying to clarify things. it's so hard to understand what he's saying on msn. and sometimes he says things and i think in my head - "what?!" (don't take this the wrong way enoch) haha.. but i enjoy our conversations. oh enoch.. only because i consider you such a good friend :P

i just got this fwd from my sister about words women use.. and their hidden implications. i found the following amusing:

FINE - This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
NOTHING - This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"
LOUD SIGH - This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".
THANKS - A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.
GO AHEAD - This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

the meaning for FINE is somewhat accurate. i don't think i use NOTHING in the way it's described here a lot. the LOUD SIGH thing made me laugh.. reminded me of how bri doesn't understand the way i loudly sigh just for no reason sometimes. so this interpretation of LOUD SIGH isn't accurate at all.. at least for me. i love sighing.. it makes me feel better. so if i ever loudly sigh when i'm with you.. don't take it the wrong way :P and THANKS and GO AHEAD.. i just found those ones pretty funny.. :D

And even if a person subscribes to a certain take on life he feels is the right take, it's not because he had a lot to do with it. If we grew up in Christian homes and heard about Jesus all our lives, we shouldn't believe we arrived at these theological positions through an independent navigation of our minds. We were just going with the flow, and there isn't any genius in going with the flow. -- Donald Miller

it's sad.. i'm still reading Searching For God Knows What. summer's 3/4 over and i'm not even done (close tho!). i'm just DETERMINED to finish it before i start another book. i dunno why it's even taking so long.. it's really not that bad.

anyways.. that little bit (above) caught my attention. he talks about ppl always having to be RIGHT. as if whatever they want to be right about is their own.. but he says it's really not like that. the stuff we think about.. whatever we think we're RIGHT about.. is likely not from ourselves. it's from something we learned from someone else. original thought is so hard to come by..

i always had the desire to have original thoughts. but alas.. i fail pretty miserably. even the content of this blog isn't original since it's Donald Miller's. and then he admits that he just repeats what he is taught too. but as hard as it is to be original.. it's still great that you can take SOMEONE's original thought.. and apply it in your own life to make it something entirely new and meaningful to yourself. that's how we learn right? and how we relate to others. like when we read the bible.. when we have conversations with ppl. sometimes i think it's being self-absorbed when you keep wanting to relate everything back to yourself. but i think it's necessary.

.... And yet it is amazing how I can take these beautiful things Jesus told me, this skeleton of the human story He explains in narrative and poetry, and turn it around as though I wrote it on the back of a napkin at Denny's in a moment of inspiration.

expectations.. i once said they were dangerous. i still think that.

why do i expect so much from ppl but so little from God? because christianity and everything about it is so relational.. i find myself consulting ppl for things more than i consult God. It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man. this is the truth. a truth i often forget. what a shame..

so why are expectations so dangerous? when they are not met.. we get upset. when ppl let us down.. we blame them. when things don't go the way we want.. we complain. blah blah.. we run the risk of being hurt. but i guess expecting things from ppl and situations can be good tho too. (dang. is there ONE thing out there that doesn't have 2 sides to it?!) if expectations did not exist.. we wouldn't know how to trust ppl..?

so i guess i'm just wondering why i've been expecting things from ppl but not believing and expecting in what the Lord can do. prayers are prayed.. but where comes the point where i've truly lifted it up to Him and EXPECT His mighty hand to work? expectations of ppl are dangerous. but expectations of God are awesome. and He never fails. even if we think He's failed.. it's just us being stupid and putting Him in a box again. because when things don't happen the way we want them to.. we automatically assume it's not good. man. OPEN OUR EYES GOD. open our eyes to YOUR GREATNESS. we are finite beings. but YOU are infinite. PTL!

...... and i didn't even mention anything about His expectations for us...

a great weekend spent in toronto. i know i always say i hate the city.. but i LOVE THE PPL :D

exec retreat this past weekend was reeeally enjoyable. i loved that the weekend was so relaxed despite all the stuff we had to get done. it was great to just hang out and have a good time together :) and yes.. we got some planning done too.. no worries! thanks again to jon for his hospitality and always yummy cooking.. and thanks to shelbs for driving too!

















squat fest in front of jon's house.

















girls in the woods

















group shot in the forest.. look we added a member to our group! :P

















last group pic.. minus jess. she had to leave early for work.


lotsa ppl were at the mall and visited me at work today! antoine was there at the beginning of my shift. then lina came after she was done work.. and ken and cho were in town so they said hi too! and i even got to take my break and chat with them. it was extremely busy today too so the time went by super fast. i like when that happens :D

been reading 1 Timothy again..

The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. 1 Timothy 1:5

Paul tells Timothy to command certain men not to teach false doctrines any longer nor to devote themselves to myths and endless genealogies. the goal of the command is love. Paul ultimately wants them to do what is right. that is what we want for ppl that we love right?

love comes from a pure heart. i like that.. i guess sincere love comes from a heart that is free from corruption, sin, and just plain dirtiness. we sing purify my heart.. let me be as gold and precious silver.. a pure heart is a simple thing.. but so hard to attain.

love comes from a good conscience. i guess your conscience must also be free of bad stuff too in order to love. this makes sense.. because how can you love when you are bogged down by your conscience? it'd be hard. better to practise right conduct so your love comes from a good example.

love comes from a sincere faith. our faith in the Lord is what motivates us to love. it only makes sense since our love comes from Him.. because we certainly are not great examples of love by ourselves. He's such a great example to follow. but to love like He loves is such a great expectation to fulfill and one that we are challenged by everyday. i just pray that i keep taking this challenge seriously...