By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me. John 5:30

Jesus stresses his dependence on the Father. He judges only as he hears from the Father, which makes his judgment fair.

now i know we don't have nearly the kind authority that Jesus has. but to judge only as we hear from the Father... that would be awesome. no more stupid snap judgments that are wrong.. no more barriers in relationships because of bad judgments. our thoughts would be so much more pure.. coming from the Father. His opinion of us.. seeing ppl as God does. that would be the BEST!


side notes/random information:

- lei has joined the world of blogging. check out his blog! it's linked in my friends list.
- my dad wants me to get a perm. hahaahahaa.
- come to shirley's STARLIGHT CHARITY BALL this FRIDAY! you'll have fun AND you'll be giving to the Canadian Cancer Society. and shirley's in the date auction! woohooo.. that information ALONE should be enough motivation to go :P hehee.. for more info check out http://www.starlightcharityball.com

i remember roger saying awhile ago that he doesn't like singing the part in the song Create In Me a Clean Heart that goes "take not thy Holy Spirit from me". he said something along the lines of.. it's ridiculous to sing that because God gives His Spirit to us so abundantly all the time.. the Spirit is always with us anyways. why on earth would God take it away from us? and i remember thinking at the time.. that's true. but what about all the times when it FEELS like it isn't with us?

and then i read this verse recently..

For the one whom God has sent speaks the words of God, for God gives the Spirit without limit. John 3:34

so there it is. it's probably just us when we don't feel the Spirit working. our own flesh telling us it's not there.. and there's something wrong with us. but i guess something is wrong if you're not aware that the Spirit is working.. because it does work. it works OVERTIME. you just have to adjust your awareness of it.

we shouldn't pray to live, we should live to pray.

that's something i heard from a speaker during my panama missions trip. i wrote it in my trip journal three years ago. wow.. 3 years doesn't seem like a long time. but it feels like that was ages ago. it's cool to read stuff you wrote a long time ago and see how you've changed. anyways.. that line reminded me of mystery men.. the sphinx's hilarious lines like to learn my teachings, i must first teach you how to learn and he who questions training only trains himself at asking questions. yes i imdb'd the quotes :P hahaha i love them. even tho they're cheesy.

so living to pray instead of praying to live.. ahh what a concept. how to practically apply it.. just pray MORE. pray A LOT. pray for EVERYTHING. do iiit. and if you can.. do it with others. you'll be blessed like a million times more :D not to say that praying by yourself isn't great tho. there's just something about praying with others that makes me feel good inside :D i miss it.. i really do. looking fwd to acf prayer meetings this year!

praying with shelbs, chris, and yp after feet washing at CC.. mm that was awesome.

mmm.. sleeping in and enjoying a quiet day at home is the best medicine for a busy and tiring week :D

something i started writing last week and finished today:

there's something about brutal honesty that i love. being real as i've talked about so highly in the past. when someone's confided in you about something.. it's a great feeling. to know that someone would like to be vulnerable enough and be completely transparent. i love it. i wish i could reciprocate more often. but i digress.. back to brutal honesty. what do i love so much about it? i'd rather be offended and know the truth then to be made to think everything is fine and be deceived.

Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Proverbs 27:5

i love rebukage. not that i'm good at it.. or i do it often even. but i love the act. and even tho i don't enjoy being rebuked.. as hard as it can be sometimes.. it's so worth it.

And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son." Hebrews 12:5-6

sometimes God uses others to speak to you. to give you a kick in the butt. i really appreciate it when ppl are bold enough to do that. discipline and rebuking are a sign that God loves you. He does this to those He calls His children. a typical person takes offense to criticism. as soon as words are spoken.. this defensive guard goes up and we think the person criticizing us (who loves us) is wrong. but usually (hopefully) if the person is right.. you must realize that heeding their advice and encouragement is the best thing to do. and it's accepting God's love. it's discouraging if someone takes rebuke the wrong way.. but it's not up to you change someone. it must be entrusted to the Lord.

"God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."
1 Peter 5:5b

we should continually humble ourselves before the Lord. and being humble is not just a thought.. and desire is not enough. it has to be an action.

i forgot to blog about my experience on monday morning. so i'm waiting at the bus stop on campus to go for my GAP training. i decided to sit on the concrete beside the bus shelter because the bench was wet from rain. as i'm sitting there.. i see this potato bug on the side walk and it's on its back struggling.. legs flailing in the air. it really was a pitiful sight. i think all it wanted was to get back on its feet. so i thought to myself i should get up and help it get on its feet. but i was sooo tired and kind of in a daze just looking at it. so.. with the intention of helping the poor bug.. i just sat there for like a minute staring at it. and i didn't see the girl coming down the sidewalk. but it was too late. in one second, life for that potato bug ceased. murdered by a flip flop-wearing oblivious girl :( and it was my fault.. for not helping it get on its feet sooner. that'll teach me a lesson in procrastination! aaahhh. it may seem trivial. but i think it was a little lesson from God.. to tell me to STOP WAITING AND DO SOMETHING. the repercussions of waiting can have dreadful consequences.

oh yaa.. prompted by shelby's blog. FROSH CONNEXION. everyone in toronto.. you should go!! i would go if i lived there.. :P and i might go anyways haha.. hopefully!?

why am i the way i am? because God made me this way..........

but that's just an excuse.

ppl change all the time. so why can't i.

baby steps? no i want GIANT STEPS!! NOOOOW!!!

but it's scary. it's hard.

and i get frustrated. when ppl don't seem to care as much as i do.. but i can't really say anything. when i seem to have stopped caring too. but.. i haven't. not completely. or not at all?

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.
Psalm 130:5